Finding Your It Factor

How To Articulate Your Thoughts So They Make Sense To Others

September 11, 2019 Heather Sager Episode 2
Finding Your It Factor
How To Articulate Your Thoughts So They Make Sense To Others
Chapters
Finding Your It Factor
How To Articulate Your Thoughts So They Make Sense To Others
Sep 11, 2019 Episode 2
Heather Sager

Have you ever had an awesome thought, but when you open your mouth to speak it doesn't come out anything like in your head? Or worse, you held it in because you couldn’t muster the courage to try. 

When it comes to articulating our ideas, THE STRUGGLE. IS. REAL. 

Whether it's speaking up in a meeting, thinking on your feet during a Q&A​ or addressing a price question with a client, you've got to clearly and concisely share your thoughts and jump into the conversations that matter.

Check out today's episode of Finding Your It Factor and you'll learn:

  • Why so many of us struggle speaking up
  • The secret to becoming more concise
  • An exercise to externally process your thoughts
  • Sentence starters to get you into action

And hey, If you like today's show, hit that SUBSCRIBE button so you don't miss the next one.

Do you have a live presentation coming up? Get my Pro Speaker Planning Guide. It covers the things you didn't know you needed to. Hint... that slide deck is just the beginning. 

Get the 10 Must Ask Questions Before Taking the Stage

**********************
PS... Let’s connect on Instagram or Facebook

Show Notes Transcript

Have you ever had an awesome thought, but when you open your mouth to speak it doesn't come out anything like in your head? Or worse, you held it in because you couldn’t muster the courage to try. 

When it comes to articulating our ideas, THE STRUGGLE. IS. REAL. 

Whether it's speaking up in a meeting, thinking on your feet during a Q&A​ or addressing a price question with a client, you've got to clearly and concisely share your thoughts and jump into the conversations that matter.

Check out today's episode of Finding Your It Factor and you'll learn:

  • Why so many of us struggle speaking up
  • The secret to becoming more concise
  • An exercise to externally process your thoughts
  • Sentence starters to get you into action

And hey, If you like today's show, hit that SUBSCRIBE button so you don't miss the next one.

Do you have a live presentation coming up? Get my Pro Speaker Planning Guide. It covers the things you didn't know you needed to. Hint... that slide deck is just the beginning. 

Get the 10 Must Ask Questions Before Taking the Stage

**********************
PS... Let’s connect on Instagram or Facebook

Speaker 1:

good conversation because the topic was brought up by a few of my followers on Instagram and it's actually a question that I get a lot and it comes down to how do we articulate our thoughts in a more coherent way so that people understand us and we have the gall to speak up in conversation, whether it's in a meeting or you're on a sales call or your in a Q and a on a live presentation. How do we get those ideas out of our heads, through our mouth, out into the world so that others actually understand them and get them and want to continue to talk with us. And you know, this is something that I used to struggle with a lot and if I'm being totally honest with you, I still struggle with sometimes I, I feel like sometimes the things in our head seem so much more logical than how they do when they come out of our mouth.

Speaker 1:

And you just get comfortable with this idea that when you do the work and you learn how to articulate yourself, you just have to trust in it and stop getting caught up and self-conscious thinking that you're not communicating with yourself. You probably are much better at this then you give yourself credit for. But nonetheless, we're going to talk about that today. And so here's a couple of the situations where it might pop up for you. Maybe you'll feel like your words are a little circular, that it takes you a really long time to finally get to your point. Uh, maybe you struggle articulating yourself on camera, whether you're doing like 17 takes on your iPhone to try to come up with one Instagram story and then you'll finally just bail because it's way too long to post. Or maybe you're trying to shoot a video for your course or your website and every time you hit record, you just get all awkward and fumbly and can't seem to get your point across.

Speaker 1:

Maybe you struggle speaking up when you're having a difficult conversation at home with your partner or a really close because you don't want to hurt their feelings and you want to say things just the right way but aren't quite sure how to, maybe it's in a meeting and you have outside of the box idea and you're not quite sure how others react, so you hold it in because I get you're not quite sure how to get it out or a call with a prospect or maybe you just feel like other people get really confused when you speak. Wherever you are on this, you are not alone. Like I said, this is something that I hear so often and I have struggled it so much with it too and that's what we're going to dive into today. So we're going to talk about the real reason why you're struggling with this and I'm going to share with you an actual the process that I go through that I went through, but I still use quite often to stay on top of it to make sure that I'm actually showing up and speaking in the way that I want to speak in different situations.

Speaker 1:

So I'm going to share with you a three step process that'll help you with this and I think it really going to love it. So before we dive in, you know, I have to tell you that this topic was something that has been really on my mind for quite a while. And yesterday I went for a run and I was listening to a podcast and I had to stop the recording because I had so many ideas for this episode and I knew if I did not get them out on paper right at that moment, I would forget. And the the really good ideas that I have, I knew it'd be valuable. This is where I was really articulating my thoughts around this three step process. So what I did is I stopped running, pulled my phone out of my armband and hit the audio record button and started doing an audio member memo for myself so that I would remember.

Speaker 1:

But I didn't want to stop my run because I was really in a good, like a really good stride, a really good flow. So, uh, I was two miles into a five k run and I kept running while I was recording and I'm going to have to share this on my Instagram stories to go check it out. But I actually have a three or four minute memo to myself of me, like very embarrassingly PAYE anted in the background because I'm like a full on run mode down the street. People probably thought it was crazy because I was running with a phone in my hand talking to it. But you know, sometimes when you have ideas you just have to capture them. And that's what I did. So that was the basis of my outline for today's show. So here we go. Let's talk through it.

Speaker 1:

So I want to challenge you for just a moment to think about. The real reason why you struggle with this, because I believe, and this might be a little controversial, but here we go. The the real issue, not about your inability to articulate yourself, it's more so about your lack of belief in what you have to say is actually valuable at all. So stewing on that for a moment. You either have one or two reactions, one going, girl, you crazy. I of course, what I have to say is valuable. Like that's not it at all. Stick with me for just a moment. But if you're in the other basket and you're thinking, oh, I had never considered it that way before. We're going to explore this a bit, but I want to introduce to you something that has made a profound impact in my life, specific to how I run my business, how we approach my relationships, my personal development, but also bringing it now into how I model out my communication.

Speaker 1:

And it's something called the model and I was introduced to it by Castillo, who runs the life coach school. I listened to her podcast. It's incredible by the way, go check it out. But she talks about this idea that if you're unhappy with your results, you need to go back a couple degrees to think about what's actually causing your results. And she talks about that our thoughts create our emotions and our emotions create our actions and our actions create our results. And a lot of times when I, I hear people talking about their frustration for how they're communicating or their inability to communicate. They're talking about the actions piece. They're talking about this in ability to speak up in a certain moment or an inability to form compelling and persuasive messaging in their conversations. But really if we, if we go backwards a little bit, the action being the lack of speaking up or the lack of articulating herself really is from how we feel about those moments.

Speaker 1:

So if we're feeling insecure, if we're feeling frustrated with ourselves, if we're feeling like other people might be disappointed in what we have to say are confused by what we see, we're worried about their feelings. And it really leads back to our own insecurities. And our own lack of belief in ourself, our emotions are getting the best of us and preventing us from taking action. Does that resonate with you at all? Yeah. Taking that a step further, if we go back and say, what are the thoughts that we have in our minds that are causing us to feel that way? So if you, let's say you're sitting on a call with a prospect, okay, let's say you're having a conversation and maybe it's a sales conversation and you're wanting to pitch your program. Maybe you do one on one coaching, or maybe you have a product that you're selling and you're having a conversation with them and you're getting to that point where you, you're going to talk about price, you're going to talk about your offer and let's say that you really get like choked up, not like the emotional crying choked up, like choked up me.

Speaker 1:

You can't articulate yourself when it comes to the money piece. So you fumble and you talk over yourself and you just keep going to try to validate what your pricing is or, or you avoid talking about the details. Maybe your, you completely avoid the conversation at all and you take it offline and say you're going to follow up with them in an email with the proposal, whatever that is, the action there that you're struggling with around money. Let's go backwards around your insecurities, around money. Let's go your insecurities around how they might be thinking at what your services value are. A, you might be feeling frustrated, you might be feeling insecure, you might be feeling nervous. There's so many feelings you might be having, but it all goes back to first. What were you thinking in that moment? So if we're telling ourselves the narrative that other people don't believe in our services or that they're going to think it's really expensive, or we're telling ourselves that there's no way they have money, that they can afford it.

Speaker 1:

This narrative that we've put into our own head, which by the way is not even true. It's just the story that we've come up with that is leading you to feel nervous and flustered and frustrated and therefore leading to your inability to act in the way that you want to act. So if you're struggling to show up in that specific moment, let's use a different example. Let's say you struggle speaking on the fly. Maybe you're in a meeting or you've given a live presentation and it's a moment of Q and a and somebody puts you on the spot. How does that phrase make you feel? When someone puts you on the spot? Do you just clam up and get super nervous and start fidgeting and fumbling and making a mess of words to try to articulate yourself or how does it, how does it make you react when someone puts you on the spot and that type of situation?

Speaker 1:

If we are really good at it, it's because we've told ourselves we're really spontaneous and we're flexible and we're really good at thinking on the fly and that's the narrative we created, so therefore we don't feel nervous or anxious in those moments. We just do it. But for the other half of us who get really nervous or flustered or frustrated when we're quote unquote put on the spot, think about the feelings that you have in that moment. Are they created by how you're thinking about that moment? Are you thinking about, oh my gosh, people are gonna think I'm stupid if I don't answer this correctly. Are you thinking about, oh my God, I'm going to get it wrong. And to me that means that I am a total fraud. Of course I don't, I wasn't meant to be here. Maybe you're talking to people that have far more experience than you and you're, and you're worried that they're going to find out that your a joke, whatever that looks like.

Speaker 1:

And this is the epitome of imposter syndrome, but we all just sit on these feelings and what happens is these feelings impact our or this, these thoughts impact our, our feelings and our emotions. And then therefore it gets in the way of US actually taking action. And when it comes to communication, this becomes detrimental on building relationships and you creating value for other people, whether it's just in a conversation or it's you delivering a video that really could impact a person's life. So the question we should be asking instead of how do I get over my fear of speaking up in the moment or how do I, how do I get my thoughts out of my head smoother? Sure, we can talk about that, but the better question to be asking is what thoughts and feelings am I having related to those situations where I'm not happy that there are or are not happening?

Speaker 1:

One of the thoughts and feelings that I'm having that are causing my inability to speak up in the way that I want to and another question to consider is what results are you not getting because of it? Is Your Business struggling with sales? Are you unhappy with how many people are engaging with you online? Are you frustrated with the quality of your relationships? Are you continually berating yourself because you leave conversations and kick yourself for yet again, not speaking up? What results are you not getting because you're not taking action and you're not taking action because the narrative that you're telling yourself isn't serving you? Does this resonate with you? I know it. It absolutely did for me. I think, thinking back for a moment, I still remember early in my career when I was working at a consulting firm for small business owners, I had just been promoted to a director level position and we had a big event down in, we were in Mexico, we were in Cabo and I was assigned to have a meeting with a client on their business and talking about how things were going and strategizing for the upcoming year.

Speaker 1:

And I was 27 years old and this business owner was in her fifties, very successful, multimillion dollar business. And I was terrified because this business owner was a new Yorker and she had a reputation about her that she was direct and to the point didn't really put up with people's, um, raw, raw or small talk. She wants to know who were you and what were you going to do for her and what was the strategy? I was terrified, terrified of this conversation so much that I asked a colleague to join me because I didn't feel like I was going to create any value in this conversation. And so for days leading up to this, I just ran through the story in my head of she's going to think, well, I'm the same age as her daughter. There's no way on in the world she's going to respect me, even listen to me.

Speaker 1:

She's going to pat my head and pretty much say, you're adorable, but stay out of my business. You don't know what you're doing. You're, you're a child. Uh, and it was all these things I was feeling physically nauseous. I was nervous. I was just making myself sick about it. And I remember we decided to have this meeting. The, the person I invited, he, he was like, Hey, let's go do it on the beach. And I was thinking like, why are we going to have a business meeting on the beach? But looking back, it was like the best idea on the planet. But so him and I are walking into the meet and I just, I was just feeling all of the feelings, not feeling good about this conversation. And he looked at me and he had asked me, hey, what's, what's going on with you?

Speaker 1:

You're, you're looking a little looking, a little green to look a little weird. And I remember asking myself, okay, do I share with him what I'm thinking? I don't want him to think I look weak or that I'm incompetent because I am super smart. I'm really good at my job and I do know what I'm doing. But the story I had placed in my head was just all the things that led to me feeling like a fraud. And I don't remember exactly what he had told me, but it was something along the lines of stop being a dump dumb. Whatever story you have going on in your head is your story. She hasn't said any of these things to you. So the re the reality is your causing all of this craziness and this craziness that you're creating in your own head, is that going to help you in this conversation or is it going to distract you from creating a meaningful conversation and being helpful?

Speaker 1:

And that to me was a big light bulb where I realized that regardless of how I was feeling the, the reality was I created those feelings. And it's fine to feel however I wanted to feel about it, but all of that emotional crap that I brought to that conversation, it wasn't helping me and it most definitely wasn't going to help the client and thank goodness I had a really great colleague who helped show that to me in that moment and I was able to go, all right, let it go, and we went into the conversation and actually had a phenomenal conversation together and in it I was, I actually used my lack of experience and age as a strength. We talked about being able to look at things from a different perspective. The reason why I wanted to share this with you today is this conversation was just, I don't know, eight years ago, and since then that cycle of imposter syndrome has hit me so many times and every time that it does, I have to go back to that exact same question my friend asked me and that was, is this the, all these feelings that I'm having, all these thoughts that I'm having around the narrative that I've created first, is it true?

Speaker 1:

And secondly, is it serving me and is it serving my business? And I want you to ask the same question of yourself because if you're finding yourself really struggling to show up and articulate yourself and you've done the work and start asking those questions around, why are you feeling that way? What are you thinking about that are causing those feelings? And is that narrative serving you? Is it serving you to say, I am not good at speaking? Is it serving you to say, oh, I don't do this because I'm always so nervous? Is it serving you to always say that you don't speak up, that you don't have a way with words that you like to take the back seat instead of the front seat in a in meetings or conversations? What is the narrative you're telling yourself and how is it working for you?

Speaker 1:

Because if you are complaining about your inability to communicate or frustrated by how others just seem to have a more natural tact for it, I bet you you're not getting the results that you want in your business or in your career. And that's really what you're frustrated with. So let's talk about how we actually change that narrative. So the first I want you to do the work and ask yourself some of the questions that I had been walking you through here today. Start asking yourself, how are you feeling when you have those moments of frustration about not being able to speak up? What is it that's going through your mind? How are you feeling about it? And this is some, this might sound a little weird to you, but I'm a big journaler. I think that there's so much power in you actually writing down your thoughts.

Speaker 1:

So I'm going to encourage you today and you're going to notice this a lot on my show. I'm an encourage you to get a pen on paper and explore your thoughts a bit. What is causing these feelings that you're having? What are you telling yourself? And explore that a bit because until you get to that root situation about you understanding that narrative and then starting to change it. This, the tactics that I'll teach you. Sure they'll, they'll work a bit. But you're always gonna have that lingering issue. And that insecurity of not feeling like your an expert communicator or that you're just good at articulating yourself. You have to build the confidence within yourself first. And that starts by questioning how you show up in your beliefs. So that's my first encouragement for you is to do the work on the journaling piece. Explore that for a bit.

Speaker 1:

And I suppose that in itself could have been a whole episode by itself, but I wanted to also create some tactical solutions for you. So how about here we pivot and let's talk about some tangible things that you can do to start working through how you show up in articulate yourself in those live moments. The first thing to talk about is the idea that you can't wait for those actual moments for the moment you get on camera for the moment. The question comes up in the meeting for the moment the audience member asks you a question on the fly. Uh, for the moment you're in a difficult conversation with your boss or you're in a sales conversation with a prospect, you cannot wait for the moment to tackle this issue. If you're waiting for that moment, you're setting up yourself for failure. You're not going to have a different result for yourself because you haven't done anything differently.

Speaker 1:

Do you? Not Up to that. So here's my three step process to help you articulate yourself with more confidence in your conversations and meetings and calls and videos and whatever other application you have for it. Step number one is anticipate what's going to happen. So, okay, here's what, here's what I mean by this. You're not going to be able to change the way you communicate every single conversation overnight. So let's first start by taking specific situations you have coming up and anticipating these moments where you want to speak up eloquently and with confidence and with authority. So think about a meeting that you have coming up on your schedule, a meeting, a conversation, a video, something that you really would like to show up with stronger articulation of your thoughts. And this is where I want you to get another pen and paper out and really think about the meeting or the conversation or, uh, the engagement itself and ask yourself what questions, what topics, what objections might come up and take a few minutes and start writing all of this out on paper.

Speaker 1:

What could come up, what decisions need to be made, what are some people's thoughts and opinions that might come up? What are your thoughts and opinions? So explore what could the conversation be about? Get it all down on paper. That's step number one. Step number two, identify three of those topics or questions or parts of the conversation that you feel passionate that you would like to be able to contribute to. Okay, let's do an example of this. Let's say that you have, let's say you have a live presentation coming up and you are freaked out about the Q and a portion of that presentation. So you're, maybe you were feeling like, oh, we should just not do it at all. That's not the right answer. Here's what we're going to do. Maybe you visualized or you wrote down a list of potential questions or objections that could come up and you identify three of these to explore and what I want you to do is do an exercise that I call the word vomit exercise.

Speaker 1:

I know word vomit, it's not sexy, but I promise that you'll remember it. Word vomit exercise is you bring up the topic out loud to yourself. It's bonus points. If you turn on an audio recorder and you ask yourself the question or you make the comment of someone else in the meeting and then you respond to it. Let's say somebody asked me a question around, hey Heather, I really struggled to articulate myself when I'm live at the moment in a meeting with my boss, every time I leave I feel like I'm leaving with things left unsaid and I think he thinks that I'm kind of a dumb, dumb and and competent because I'm never able to articulate myself or even share with him what I'm thinking. I Dunno if that resonates with you, but that's something that I have heard specifically before from my audience.

Speaker 1:

What I would do to get to the point where I could answer that question and create true meaningful value. I do this exercise called the word vomit and that's where I asked the question to myself. And now I just spend however long I need to just word vomit in, answer the question, and go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on to answering the question. And what happens is I'll start talking very circularly around it and it will take an eternity for me to get to my point. But through all those thoughts and, and ideas and randomness that I shell out in that word vomit, I'll have these brief moments of clarity where I will say a phrase that just perfectly explains what I'm trying to say. It puts my point into a very clear sentence or fragment.

Speaker 1:

I call this a golden fragment. And every once in a while we have these moments that something we say is just crystal clear and it's brilliant. And if only we took the time to write those things down so we remember them. That's what I want you to do in this exercise. So the step two is determine what questions, objections, or topics might come up and walk yourself through the word vomit exercise and start thinking about what do you have to say on this topic. Then you write down the golden fragments, the golden phrases that come out of your word Fama and you write them down so you have some predetermined thoughts on paper so you are more prepared and less rambly in the moment. So then that leads to step three. This is where you set yourself up to speak without pressure. Let me give you an example of this.

Speaker 1:

So I mentioned multiple times now that I really enjoy running. I love the act of running right when I'm finished because I feel like I have conquered the world. But getting out on a run is super hard. Running the first half a mile feels like death and it's not really until I hit the two mile mark where I actually feel good about it. I hit that zen mode where I feel like I'm not going to die. But the worst moment for me about going on a run is talking myself out of bed to get my shoes on the snow or the alarm goes off. I hit the snooze button a bajillion times and then my brain jumps in and starts telling me, Oh, all the things that I could be doing except for running, like sleeping or doing other personal development things or house chores or anything else but running.

Speaker 1:

And then I talk myself into not running by coming up with an excuse and or a plan to do it later that day. I never do it later that day. And I know that about myself. So, uh, luckily I discovered Mel Robbins five second rule. Shout out to that, go download that book right now if you haven't already. Where she talks about this idea is you have just a brief moment to make a decision to jump in and do something before your own brain talks you out of it. And I use that for me, getting out of bed in the morning. As long as that alarm goes off, if I can get my feet on the floor and sit up, I'm in five, four, three, two, one go. I am up, my feet are on the floor and then I'm ready to move on with my day.

Speaker 1:

I get immediately into my workout clothes, immediately into my shoes and I'm on the road. I do a couple things in between like brush my teeth and pee and you know all that other stuff. But uh, you get the idea. And the reason why I'm telling you this is because I bet that you probably struggle with that snooze button like so many of us do. It also comes up in your conversations. I bet you have a version of the stews button that you use to avoid speaking up in conversations to avoid saying the thing that you want to say, to ask for the sale to a, to speak what's on your mind to your, to your spouse, whatever that looks like. You have a snooze button. And being aware that you have one is very, very important, but so it's coming up with a plan for how you're going to attack it.

Speaker 1:

So just like I use Mel Robbins five second rule to get myself out of bed, you need to have a way for you to do the same thing with your thoughts and if you've done the work in step one and step two by anticipating what's going to happen, what's going to be talked about and pre-thinking about what your thoughts and opinions are of those topics. You have no excuses for not showing up and speaking up. You just need to have that brave moment where you get your feet on the floor and commit. And how we do this is I would recommend using a segway or many people call them caveats to get yourself into the conversation where you're able to get this phrase out and then you can follow it up with whatever you have to say. So some of the segues that I use, if I, if I'm not quite sure how to articulate exactly what I'm about to say, but I know I have some thoughts on it. I might say something like, I was thinking a lot about this topic before our time today and some of that kept popping up for me was

Speaker 3:

fill in the blank or you know,

Speaker 1:

I'm not quite sure how to say what I'm thinking on this, but I, I'd love to explore it. Can I externally process a moment with you? You also could say, you know, I can't help but thinking blank or I can't help but think blank or, I know this is slightly unrelated, but something that I was thinking about before I came in here today was

Speaker 3:

blank or

Speaker 1:

you know, I was thinking a lot about our conversation today and I, I took some time to put some notes on paper. You mind if I share those with you?

Speaker 4:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Okay. So all of these are examples of ways to set yourself up to speak. They don't necessarily tell you exactly what to say in the moment. You have to trust your own experience, your own intuition, your own knowledge around what to actually deliver, but nine times out of 10 all is you need is just that push to speak up and use your voice. You talk to people every single day. These people are not scary. It's just you've created a narrative in your head that something bad is going to happen if you speak up. But if you do the homework and already have your thoughts and ideas on paper, you're going to be so much more prepared. Just need a little push to get yourself out there. So let's apply this to a couple of things. Let's apply it to a sales conversation. If you consistently struggle to close a sale or to make your pitch or make your offer, you need to go through and write down the specific things that you want to talk about and then do the word vomit, exercise out loud, saying those things out loud to come up with your own way of saying it, your own golden phrases and write them down and use that as a guide in that conversation.

Speaker 1:

Same thing happens when it comes to objections or questions in presentations or sales conversations. When somebody asks you a question and it's related to you delivering information on a topic where you are an authority or an expert or have experience with, I bet you all of the questions lead back to the same core things. So what would it take for you to do a little bit of work thinking about what those questions or objectives are, objections are, and going through the word vomit exercise to come up with your golden phrases, your best answers to those and practicing those so when they come up in the moment, you're just naturally delivering that information very organically. It's not contrived. You're not nervous, it's just second nature because you've done your homework and you've thought through it. This word vomit exercise is, is the thing that has helped me get from where I used to be, which was a shy and quiet fumbling and secure girl who was terrified to speak in front of people, to someone who feels extremely confident showing up and speaking to audiences of a thousand or CEOs in a board room. I'm really confident in who I have and what my experiences are, and I'm also super confident that I don't have all the answers, but I trust in my own tuition and I trust that I can navigate conversations really well because I know what I'm talking about and I also know that I have the guts to speak up when I know it matters.

Speaker 4:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Let's go on a little side tangent here. This also means you often know yourself to know that you shouldn't be speaking up if it's only to serve your own ego. If the reason why you're speaking up is just to be heard, you just want your voice to be heard. You want to know that other people know that you have an opinion, you want to feel important. Everybody else is in and so why shouldn't you? And if you find yourself struggling with this, you have to understand that when you do speak up, it should be for the benefit of the greater good of the conversation. So if you're trying to help the person you're working with, the things that you bring up should be helpful. If you're collaborating in a meeting with your coworkers or your team, the things that you bring up should be helpful and help move people towards the ultimate goal you're working towards.

Speaker 1:

So if you find yourself unsure if whether or not what you have to say is valuable or if it's stroking your ego, just explore that for a moment. And I don't remember what the sane is around this, but if you're worried that what you have to say is valuable or not, if you're asking that question, I bet it is valuable because the people who have the ego and just want to be heard, they're not asking that question. They're just blowing right past that question and just speaking. So just the sheer fact that you're concerned that you might be talking too much or that other people might not care what you have to say. Or if you're really through your head, it means that you actually care. And what you say matters. So trust your gut. Go through this process we talked about today to develop your own identity around why you're not showing up.

Speaker 1:

Work through that. And then use my three tips for you. Showing up with more confidence in articulate yourself, articulating yourself better in more conversations. So sometimes it's just having the bravery to start. It's that push you need, but first explore why you're feeling this way in the first place because it really might be based off a narrative that's completely untrue. It might just be that you've labeled yourself a bad communicator, but you're not. You just didn't have a framework to help you work through this, but now you do so you no longer have an excuse to say you're bad at it. I actually want you to replace that narrative. If you find yourself saying, I'm bad at this, or I struggle with this, replace that, and I want you to now say this, I'm becoming the kind of person who's brave enough to speak up and wise enough to prepare for it.

Speaker 1:

That is your new mantra and I hope you enjoyed today's episode. I threw a lot at you when I really encourage you, if you're listening to this in the car or on a run, come back to this. When you're sitting in front of a notebook and a pen and do that journaling work, it'll help you make big strides in how you show up in your business. And if you did enjoy today's episode, which you let me know, please take a screenshot, post it to Instagram and tag me at the Heather Sager. I would love to see you over there and tell me what was it that struck you most today. Can't wait to see you next week. See you then. [inaudible]

Speaker 2:

forward slash 10 questions [inaudible].