Finding Your It Factor

Elevating your confidence through your style with Melanie Kluger

September 18, 2019 Episode 3
Finding Your It Factor
Elevating your confidence through your style with Melanie Kluger
Chapters
Finding Your It Factor
Elevating your confidence through your style with Melanie Kluger
Sep 18, 2019 Episode 3
Heather Sager

If you want to elevate your personal brand, get super clear on your personal style and bring it every day to your business. Whether it's for a keynote talk, a Facebook live, or a zoom chat with a prospect, when you feel confident in what you’re wearing you naturally show with more authority.

In today’s episode, I’m welcoming my first guest, Melanie Kluger, to talk to us about the link between style and confidence (which of course is essential to becoming a magnetic brand).

Melanie is a personal stylist, best selling author, closet connoisseur and creator of THE CONFIDENT CLOSET. She believes that you can use your clothes as a tool to be seen the way that you want to be seen. But it’s more than how others perceive you, it's about you showing up for yourself. If you truly know your style and you feel confident in what you're wearing, you show up in the world in a very different way. And especially if you’re an entrepreneur with a personal brand this is something you can use to elevate your business.

// Links mentioned in this episode //

In this interview, you'll learn:

  • confidence boosting (and super practical) tips on dressing for a big presentation
  • the thing that’s sabotaging your morning routine
  • why our closet keeps us stalled after life transitions (like changing careers or having kids)
  • how to dress for the work from home (but video ready) life style
  • plus balancing mom life with business and Instagram story hack

Can’t wait to hear your favorite little gem from this episode. Take a screenshot and post to IG stories and tag me @theheathersager #FYIFPodcast

Ready for more? Hit that SUBSCRIBE button so you don't miss the next FYIF episode.

Ready to NAIL YOUR NEXT TALK? If you have a live presentation, workshop or talk coming up and you want to show up as an authority and turn that event into future business, get my 10 Must Ask Questions Before Taking the Stage.  It's the ultimate planning guide full of the tips and strategies that you didn't know you needed to know.


More about today’s guest // 

MELANIE KLUGER is a renowned personal stylist, best selling author, and closet connoisseur. She’s the creator and founder of THE CONFIDENT CLOSET, a 6-week-long program to help you get to the bottom of why you have a closet that is underwhelming, overwhelming, and/or not an accurate representation of who you are. Melanie’s approach is refreshing, body-positive, and gives you an answer to the question, “Why do I have a closet full of clothes and nothing to wear?” After working with women for over 15 years, Melanie realized that no matter who you are or what you look like, the insecurities and frustrations are the same. We all want to feel amazing in our clothes, and we all get frustrated with our wardrobes. She set out to change that and has been fullsteam-ahead ever since. For more about Melanie and how you can have a closet you love, head over to THECONFIDENTCLOSET.COM and follow Melanie on Instagram.

Show Notes Transcript

If you want to elevate your personal brand, get super clear on your personal style and bring it every day to your business. Whether it's for a keynote talk, a Facebook live, or a zoom chat with a prospect, when you feel confident in what you’re wearing you naturally show with more authority.

In today’s episode, I’m welcoming my first guest, Melanie Kluger, to talk to us about the link between style and confidence (which of course is essential to becoming a magnetic brand).

Melanie is a personal stylist, best selling author, closet connoisseur and creator of THE CONFIDENT CLOSET. She believes that you can use your clothes as a tool to be seen the way that you want to be seen. But it’s more than how others perceive you, it's about you showing up for yourself. If you truly know your style and you feel confident in what you're wearing, you show up in the world in a very different way. And especially if you’re an entrepreneur with a personal brand this is something you can use to elevate your business.

// Links mentioned in this episode //

In this interview, you'll learn:

  • confidence boosting (and super practical) tips on dressing for a big presentation
  • the thing that’s sabotaging your morning routine
  • why our closet keeps us stalled after life transitions (like changing careers or having kids)
  • how to dress for the work from home (but video ready) life style
  • plus balancing mom life with business and Instagram story hack

Can’t wait to hear your favorite little gem from this episode. Take a screenshot and post to IG stories and tag me @theheathersager #FYIFPodcast

Ready for more? Hit that SUBSCRIBE button so you don't miss the next FYIF episode.

Ready to NAIL YOUR NEXT TALK? If you have a live presentation, workshop or talk coming up and you want to show up as an authority and turn that event into future business, get my 10 Must Ask Questions Before Taking the Stage.  It's the ultimate planning guide full of the tips and strategies that you didn't know you needed to know.


More about today’s guest // 

MELANIE KLUGER is a renowned personal stylist, best selling author, and closet connoisseur. She’s the creator and founder of THE CONFIDENT CLOSET, a 6-week-long program to help you get to the bottom of why you have a closet that is underwhelming, overwhelming, and/or not an accurate representation of who you are. Melanie’s approach is refreshing, body-positive, and gives you an answer to the question, “Why do I have a closet full of clothes and nothing to wear?” After working with women for over 15 years, Melanie realized that no matter who you are or what you look like, the insecurities and frustrations are the same. We all want to feel amazing in our clothes, and we all get frustrated with our wardrobes. She set out to change that and has been fullsteam-ahead ever since. For more about Melanie and how you can have a closet you love, head over to THECONFIDENTCLOSET.COM and follow Melanie on Instagram.

Heather:
0:00
Today's episode is all about creating confidence through your personal style. And to help me with this conversation, I'm inviting my friend and guest to the show, Melanie Kluger. So before I bring her on, I want to tell you a little bit about who she is and why I thought this topic was so perfect for you today. So Melanie is a phenomenal personal stylist. She's a bestselling author and a closet connoisseur. She's a leading expert in her field and helps women from all over the globe with their closets and their style. She's the creator and founder of an amazing program called the confident closet and it's a six week program to help you get to the bottom of why you have a closet that is underwhelming overwhelming and not an accurate representation of who you are. Now. The reason why I asked Melanie to join me here today was two fold. One because I love her style and her energy and everything about her.
Heather:
1:44
I follow her on Instagram. We've been friends for, I don't know, probably a year now. We actually met or taking a program together about building online courses and I loved what she had to offer so much that I started following her, like stocking her style. I love her Instagram stories, but beyond that I started realizing that in, in terms of building your own personal brand, really creating the confidence that you need to to get your message out into the world. Style is a big piece of that. Now if you're thinking that, oh my goodness, Heather, we're going to talk about clothes and style today and you're ready to bounce. Oh, pause here, my friend. Because how you show up to your audience from what you say to what you wear to everything pulled all together. That's the representation of your brand. And if you're anything like me, maybe you like fashion, you dabble in shopping and you like makeup or I don't know any of those things, but this idea of having a unique and personal style, a look that people can associate you with that they can come to expect that really just exudes your brand.
Heather:
2:53
That's never something that I've ever been intentional with and I'm just going to guess for a moment that maybe you are not as intentional with it either. So today's conversation, regardless of your affinity of fashion, is one that is needed. Because if you want to become a remarkable recognized brand to have your customers connect with you, you have to have style and Melanie is going to help you find it. Here we go.
Heather:
3:34
All right, Melanie, I am so excited to welcome you to the show. Welcome, welcome.
Melanie:
3:38
Hi. Thanks for having me.
Heather:
3:40
Of course. I can't believe. Okay, so you officially are the first guest on the podcast. . Exciting. A. Okay, so I know this is an audio program, but Melanie and I were joking before we started recording that she is perfectly her brand right now because she showed up into our session today fully styled because her and I are a video conferencing, but you look on brand girl.
Melanie:
4:04
Oh, I thank you. I appreciate that.
Heather:
4:07
All right, so I would say, why don't we just go ahead and dive into it because I want everyone to hear your story. So why don't you tell us a little bit about who you are and what you do
Melanie:
4:15
now. Okay, so again, thanks for having me. So I'm Melanie Kluger. I'm a personal stylist. I like to say I'm also a confidence booster and a closet connoisseur, but I'm also a bestselling author. I have a book called the competent closet. You can get it on Amazon and I have an online, I have a signature course called the competent closet course and this is my signature process. I kind of realized way back when, uh, when I originally was a costume designer, I'm from New York and so I was a costume designer and I was realizing just how didn't matter what was happening in your life, you showed up on stage and you felt good about yourself, you felt confident about yourself through your clothes, like w if you liked your clothes, you felt more confident and that showed up in every other way. And so I took that knowledge and then throughout my, all my different, I was at Bri, I used to work in bridal, I was a bridal stylist for awhile. And then I started working with entrepreneurs and then, um, I had my own kids and realized, oh my gosh, I need to be my own client. My clothes are no longer representing me and , I'm confident in my own clothes. And so I put myself through my own process. And then that's where the confident closet I was born.
Heather:
5:28
Okay. That is incredible. And I think this idea of going through a transition in your life to want to discover this new way of being you, okay, I want to hit on that. Actually want to start there because what you just described, becoming a mom and realizing you have to go through your process. We have a lot of mom people listening, but also a lot of people transitioning to becoming business owners. And that's where I'm in and transitioning from being a corporate employee to now a business owner. So I want you to talk a little bit about that transitional period and what we need to be thinking about.
Melanie:
6:01
So I think what happens if, first of all, it's super common and I think it happens. It's going to happen again. Like it happened several times in our life, right? Where our lifestyle changes weather and also our size could change. Again, we're moms, right? I have two kids. So I think what ends up happening is we end up, uh, maybe we change, maybe we buy some new things, maybe, you know, but we don't, we leave the old stuff in the closet. Um, sometimes we don't buy that many new things and then we're just frustrated that we can't wear the things that we use to wear, but we don't have the new things that we need. Or essentially what happens is every morning you wake up and you're looking at an old life, you're listening, you know your corporate clothes or the size you used to be. Or you know, when you used to live in the city and now you live in the suburbs and, and instead of looking at your closet and being like, I can wear any of this. You're like, well, I can't wear that. I can't wear that. And it's not like a positive mindset. So to me it's like super important to be able to wake up every morning and get dressed and be excited about the clothes that you can wear. Not like longing for the clothes that you know you, that don't suit you anymore, that don't work for you anymore.
Heather:
7:11
Oh my goodness. There's such a correlation between that idea of like one of the first things we do in the morning after we go through our morning routine is get dressed for the day. And you're totally right. There's that dreaded moment of when you're on inspired about what's in your closet.
Melanie:
7:23
Like how are you supposed to start off the day? Like conquering all of the things. I kind of like, I have this thing because everyone talks about morning routine. It's like something that everyone talks about these days. And I feel like so often if you don't like the process of getting dressed or undoing all that meditation and like all that other stuff that you just did and then you're frustrated and then you leave the house.
Heather:
7:44
You know, I've never thought about that before. And to be perfectly honest, and you could see it right now if Melanie were joking and she is super stylish and right now I am currently wearing my running clothes cause I'm going to go running after we're done. But I, uh, everyday I get up and I look at my closet and I'm like, should I actually put on your pants today or should I just wear my running clothes all day And I, I feel better on the days I get dressed.
Melanie:
8:06
Well, I was just going to say like, I don't know how you get motivated when you work out, but for me, I like to think about how I feel about after. And so that helps me to do the workout and be excited about the workout. And I feel the same way about clothes. So sometimes I'll be like, you know, you can say to yourself like, am I going to stay on my running clothes all day? And then you're like, it would take me 10 minutes to change and to, you know, can I do let anything in 10 minutes? I would say like timing. Right? So like how long would it actually take you to change and how much better would you feel? You know, if you're someone who, like you love your workout clothes and you feel amazing and great and then, but that's not usually the case. So like, just changing after the workout, like, you know, obviously showering and all that kind of stuff as positive. But I, and that actually has taken me a really long time to figure out how I'm gonna work out, shower, everything done and not feel like it's taken up a huge chunk of time.
Heather:
8:58
Yeah. Okay. So stepping back here for a moment, I'm sure someone listening is going, okay, why the heck are we talking about clothes and our closets on a podcast around becoming a more magnetic communicator? So I want you to talk about what we were chatting about before we got on here, around this connection between how we perceive ourselves and our confidence with our style.
Melanie:
9:21
Well, yeah, I think that sometimes we underestimate the importance of our style, especially, you know, when you talk about being a magnetic communicator, right? So like to me, magnetic means people are drawn to you and I think you can use your clothes as a tool to sort of, uh, show up in the way that you want to be seen, right? So it's not just about how they're going to perceive you, it's about how you're showing up for yourself. And so I think clothes is, I like to use clothes as a vehicle for that, right? So to me, if you truly know your style and you feel confident in what you're wearing, you show up in the world in a very different way. And especially if you have a brand and if you're an entrepreneur, like this is something you can really use to help elevate your business.
Heather:
10:03
Yeah, I, I 100% agree with this and it's, you know, it's really easy to be like, oh wait, it really doesn't matter. Like I only do, I only go on stage every once in a while. I'm usually at home working behind my desk. People don't see me. But that idea that it's, it's not just about how your audience perceives you, it's how you perceive yourself is really, really important.
Melanie:
10:23
And I feel like to think, okay, like, well think about, I mean I have like stories of people who like once they felt really aligned in their style, they went and asked for a raise or they like once they felt really good about what they were wearing, like their talk and they were able to speak more eloquently. It really does. I'm not saying that I like to use it, I gotta say like as a vehicle, right? So I also don't think that like I'm very body positive and I talk a lot about that and I just don't, I don't think that we should underestimate, everyone gets stressed and if you're like not caring at all, I think that that's not taking care of yourself. You know, you've got to show up in the world the way that you want to be seen for you, not for everybody else.
Heather:
10:59
I totally agree. You know, I actually have a client that she and I were talking about this a couple of weeks ago, so I'm coaching her on getting better at communication on Youtube. And she talks to people about how to feel better about themselves by combining beauty with fitness. And it's a really interesting thing because some people feel that, oh my goodness, if you're talking about fitness or you're talking about beauty, you must be conceded and care more about your body than your bigger purpose. And I think you could totally, if you want to go down that lane, you can. But there's nothing wrong in wanting to feel better about yourself by taking care of yourself if you're doing it for how you feel.
Melanie:
11:36
So I have an online course called the Confident Closet. And in there I do interviews and we just did one with a makeup artist. And we talked about how, what if you shift the mindset around putting makeup on and thinking about how can I embrace my features instead of how can I change face? How can I change this? How can I contour? No, how can I enhance my eyes? How can I bring out, you know, this feature that I really love about myself? So that way you're like, it's like a positive experience. Think about what that would do for your day if that's how you're starting your day instead of again going into your closet, you don't like anything you're wearing, you're thinking about your own life and you've got to put your makeup on and you're like, let me change my cheekbones, you know?
Heather:
12:18
Oh my gosh, that's so okay. I was talking about the exact same thing in a different context yesterday. It was around evaluating yourself and giving yourself feedback. Whereas most people when they evaluate themselves and the lane I was talking about was watching your own videos was we all immediately go to, oh my God, my hands look weird, or my nose looks big, or I don't know how to pronounce this or say this is all the wrong things. But really if you want to get better at that, you have to focus on what your strengths are and enhancing those. And so I just had this like bind moment of it's the exact same thing when it comes to your style of as enhanced what you love and not what you, hate.,
Melanie:
12:55
yes. I've had to sort of work on this for myself with like business too because I'm just, I can be a little bit of a perfectionist so I completely relate to this being like okay I'm going to evaluate this thing. But you definitely have to be a negative conversation, you know?
Heather:
13:10
Yeah. Well I think our minds just go there automatically. And you know, we're talking a lot about makeup and style, but I want to also address the, so some of you might listening, maybe you don't care about these things or maybe you're a guy listening and you're like I'm not going to be putting on makeup or maybe you don't wear makeup at all. Like can you talk a little bit about that, that does this conversation relate to anyone?
Melanie:
13:31
I think it relates to everyone because everyone is getting dressed and especially like a lot of people that you're talking about are entrepreneurs and are giving, you know, are having to show up in a certain way. Like that's everybody. And so to me, I mean you can apply whatever I'm saying to any situation. Like if you, I actually don't wear makeup very often. I wear a bold red lip or a bold pink lip and that's it most of the time because that's how I feel confident. I think I have something, I call it the beauty basics. This could take this for what it is if you're a man, right? But either way, there are things that you do that make you feel your best before you get dressed. If you're a man, maybe it's like there's something that you do with your hair, you shave or you, there's something that you do that you know when you do it, you feel your best. And whether you're a woman or a man or an entrepreneur or a mom, whoever you are, if knowing those things, your beauty basics is what I call them. You can quickly show up for yourself and feel good about what you're doing. So I think that applies to everybody.
Heather:
14:29
Yeah, I agree with that. Might be the basic, by the way, I've always said that if I ever got just like deserted on a desert island, I would take my eyelash curler.
Melanie:
14:38
Oh my gosh. That I have. That's a good one. Um, mine is my eyebrows and my nails like.
Heather:
Melanie:
14:43
take you would take your eyebrows into nails. So I guess I would have to take my friend, my, um, lax or, yeah. Good job.
Heather:
14:53
Good girl. All right, well let's, let's dive into, you had prepared some tips relating how to become a more authentic or magnetic communicator to our audience. So why don't you share with us a couple of the tips? Why don't we start with one tip that you, that you have for bringing more confidence into, let's say speaking on stage.
Melanie:
15:13
Yeah, so, so I like w we touched on this a little bit, but I think when you're going to speak on stage, let's say you, I think it's really important to know what makes you feel your best. So it's not about what someone else is wearing or what you think might, you know, Oh I want to wear florals. Okay. But what makes you feel your best? Okay. I always feel my best when I wear an a-line dress or something about the shape that I really like, that makes me feel like I can move and I feel really, you know, aligned or I always feel my best when I wear purple. Like knowing those things, really thinking and analyzing when you feel your best and then applying that to a speaking gig is a great way to say like, okay, this is what makes me feel my best. And you know, I think that when you kind of know those things and you're applying it, you can really hone in and then elevate.
Heather:
16:04
You know, for me, I discovered a long time ago that I feel my best presenting when I wear heels. There's just something about my posture that changes and just how I move in front of an audience when I'm wearing heels versus when I'm wearing flats. I feel a little bit more sluggish. But, so you had a couple tips around shoes in particular and what to watch for because my version of a heel for confidence might not be the same as everyone else.
Melanie:
16:31
Well, I think that that, so again, I also noticed that that I show up differently when I wear heels. So I and I, that's coming becoming less and less for me. But I also like if I'm doing a speaking engagement, I always wear heels. That's because I like how I get my posture. I feel like I walked differently. But it has to be a specific kind of feel because I want to still be able to walk and move freely. And so my other tip was around movement and this works for all different, you know, men and women is that there should be an ease about the way that you're moving so that you're not thinking about your shoes or am I going to trip or this, you know, can I sometimes I think with heels it goes if it's like too high of a heel or we're not used to walking in them, we end up, it does the opposite. Cause then we're uncomfortable. So whether that means you wear them a lot around until you feel really comfortable in them or you choose a deal that's like a little bit lower. And you know, for men, I think it's also about ease of moving in your jacket, ease of movement in what you're wearing so that you are just really confident in the fact that when you go onstage you can do what you need to do and move around. Of course you can't see me because this is audio, but I'm moving my arms a lot. Um, but yeah, so, so just really thinking about that ease of movement.
Heather:
17:45
with the thinking about movement but also functionality. There was a tip came up with one of my clients last week where this is something that a lot of people forget the most of the time. If you're on stage, you're going to be using a microphone that has a battery pack. So thinking about the neck line or the stiffness, the structure of what you're wearing so that you can clip a battery pack in a Lavalier or or headset or whatever you're wearing to it. Like function for what you're about to do is huge.
Melanie:
18:14
100% and when I was a costume designer that was like a big part of the job, you know? And I think remembering that you have to wear a mic is a huge, huge thing. You probably don't always remember.
Heather:
18:24
Yeah they don't. And especially if it's not something that you do often. I know a lot of my listeners they do speaking as a vehicle to get more visibility for their business. So it's not, they're not fulltime speaker, it's not trying to go out and build a speaking business. So it's not something they do often. So remembering little tips I think is super, super valuable.
Melanie:
18:42
Yeah. Or even remembering to ask, okay, I have this big, what's the mic situation going to be?
Heather:
18:48
Yeah. Okay. So I'm going to make a shameless plug here real quick. So that asking that question and remembering to know that question is something that's so many people forget and after going through questions like that and around other technical things. With so many of my clients, I realized these are things that people don't forget about, so this is a shout out real quick. This is the time for you to go download my Freebie. The link is in the show notes and it's the 10 questions you have to be asking before you get on the stage and includes those kinds of questions that you're probably not thinking about.
Melanie:
19:17
Well, you know what I, that's why this is such a good freebie because you don't know to ask the question. Right. That's the thing. It's not a given that you're forgetting. You just don't know to ask it. Yeah.
Heather:
19:26
Well, and I think that's a lot of what's about this conversation in general today is every morning we all wake up and get dressed to some degree. And it's similar to how I talk about every, every day we can speak to people. And so we kind of take this ability to get dressed or speak for granted, but we forget that how we show up, both in our communication but also in how we present ourselves really is how people perceive our brands. So putting more energy and attention into it can have a really profound impact.
Melanie:
19:59
Absolutely. And you know, that was another one of the tips that I was going to share about being magnetic, you know, also has to do with, uh, having like a signature piece or having something that's memorable like I was talking about. For me it's my bold lip. Right? But maybe you always wear red. Maybe you always have a red pocket square. What is it, the thing that's gonna make you sort of like elevate and feel like you're showing up in a certain way and really feel aligned with who you are and your brand. Yeah.
Heather:
20:27
How did you discover that for you? It was the bold lip?
Melanie:
20:31
You know, it's funny, I mean if I really take it back, I when I was a costume designer, I love vintage things and to me the red is sort of like a little bit of an Ode to like, you know even the fifties are the 2020s like different time periods. But I like to make it more modern. I just, there's something about it. For me it's like a quick, easy way for me to like feel like I'm showing up. I think I started doing it more and more. All my kids got a little older cause even now they still love when I give them kisses and I'm like, now you have like red. I'm like a grandma with a big red kiss, you know, it's, for me it's important. So I'm like, I guess you guys are gonna have to sit covered in lipstick.
Heather:
21:13
Okay. That's hilarious. I'm sure pretty soon your kids will start to get embarrassed by it. But for now enjoy it for now.
Melanie:
21:18
My daughter asked and she kept it on all day. End of the day. And she still had a big kiss mark on my.
Heather:
21:24
Melting my mama heart! Oh my gosh. Okay. So for someone listening who's going, okay, this sounds great, I like the idea of having a signature style. Like what, how do they even begin to start thinking about what their signature thing is?
Melanie:
21:41
So I would say like, I would think about your brand colors, you know, like, um, you know, this also works for a photo shoot. If you're doing a photo shoot, like think about your overall website and your overall vibe of you know, what you're going for, whether that be bold. Sometimes it's not specific colors, but it's like, okay, my, my brand is very bold or my brand is very like neutral and subdued and like how can that all work together? I think that that's like a great place to start. And then I would also say for like a signature style, um, a great place to start. If you really feel like you don't know 'em is to like, please like Pinterest, kind of like create a board and like you'll, you'll notice that you gravitate towards certain things. The problem sometimes with Pinterest is like then we'd go and try those things on and they don't work on our shape. So I always think it's a mixture of like inspiration and then knowing what you like on your body.
Heather:
22:33
Yeah, I think that, I think that's super important. You know, when I was perusing through your website and looking through some of the information that you have on your course, one of the things you talk about is this juxtaposition between you...you're not a stylist for people. Like you don't go out and you're not going to do it all for them. You teach them how to do it. And I thought that was a really interesting approach because so often I think about like, so I've used like services like stitch fix before or letote where I have people ship me clothes and I've liked it, but I don't feel like I know how to dress myself any differently. So talk to me a little bit about how you made that transition from doing it for people to teaching them how to do it themselves.
Melanie:
23:13
I appreciate the services like you mentioned or like, you know, and I also, I can go shopping with you, but even if I'm gonna go shopping with you, I want you to, to, to learn how to do it for yourself because I'm not in your closet every morning. And like that's the thing that kind of always bothered me was like, if, if I do it for you, I'm almost like enabling you. It's like when you're, when you kids live with their parents and they're like in their thirties like they're enabling them. You got go,
Heather:
23:39
sorry. If you are 30 and you're living with your parents, I'm sorry, but move on honey, move on.
Melanie:
23:43
But just like, I just feel like the parents are not helping the kids, so like go out into the world and to do their own thing, whatever. That's a very specific situation. Yeah. It's important for you to know these tips and tricks for yourself also because it's very personal. So again, like you may be like, I don't like lipstick. That's fine. I'm not going to tell you to wear lipstick just because it's on trend or because I like it. To me, real confidence through your clothes comes from this understanding of what makes you feel good and you can't get there. By me telling it to you, you can only get there and only really truly understand how to trust her instincts by learning these things for yourself.
Heather:
24:24
Okay, so thinking about, I want to dig into a little bit about some specific situations that people might be going to an event or showing up on a daily basis around where they might want to have a more pulled together style. Can I like, let's do like a speed round where I give you a scenario and you tell me maybe some tips for it.
Melanie:
24:41
Yes. Perfect. Let's do it.
Heather:
24:42
Okay, so let's go with the what the normal. Let's say I that I'm going to be super selfish right now and you're actually giving me advice. Let's say I show up and I have a day of coaching calls on zoom or I'm going to be on camera with clients, but I don't have a ton of time to get ready and I'm going to be sitting for a long day. But on video, um, what, what recommendations would you have for someone showing up on video?
Melanie:
25:08
Okay, so this is a good question because when it comes to video, your whole outfit doesn't have to work in the same way as let's say if you are on stage or you were like meeting someone for coffee, right? So you really just want to focus on what they're going to see and also the comfort of sitting. Um, if you're going to be sitting for a long period of time and no one's seeing your pants where it's comfortable on the bottom, I still like to say make the out for coordinate cause I am the kind of person that will feel better. If I'm wearing sweatpants on the bottom, I won't feel as good. That's me. Focus on how you cannot, how you can feel put together and feel like you're showing up. I would wear a little bit of makeup. If you, that's your thing because your face is going to be seen, right in a certain way if it's being recorded, especially. So that's something to think about. And I always like to say, um, if you're someone, I, I sometimes play with my hair, so I like to think, okay, what is gonna make me play with my hair less? So, okay, what can I do with my hair? Like if my hair's really curly for some reason, I'm always touching it and playing with it and that's distracting. So I work on, on those things. Is that, is that all
Heather:
26:14
such a good tip? Because I think so many people forget that they, uh, that they have these quirks that they do that they don't think about. And one could be hair, but another one could be is if they wear accessories, which are great, but like what could go wrong with that?
Melanie:
26:30
You know, that is such a good thing. I was just gonna mention that too because so I like to wear bracelets but I can't wear them when I'm recording because one they clank really loud and they mess up the audio and two I like can't put my hand on my desk because it's uncomfortable. So there's no uh, nothing on your wrists when you're recording.
Heather:
26:50
I totally do that and I even can't wear bracelets and stuff when I give presentations cause I will totally be distracted with them. Yeah. Are there any, I don't know if rules is the right word, but it's like suggestions around patterns. Like sometimes I see people wearing stripes and the camera goes weird. I mean do you have any feedback on like patterns or colors when it comes to video?
Melanie:
27:10
I would say you don't really want to go to neutral cause it can sometimes looks nude and then that's especially like if it's going to be a thumbnail because that person..
Heather:
27:18
Naked so just could be on brand.
Melanie:
27:21
There you go. I'm a person if that's your brand and ignore this tip. I also think that was certain patterns. Yeah. With videos, sometimes certain patterns look really busy. You can wear a pattern. But I would say try to keep it pretty minimal or you know, clean if that makes sense.
Heather:
27:39
No, I totally agree with that. And so, and I know they can't see you here today, but you're wearing like this really cute like collar popped white shirt with an awesome scarf tied around your neck that has a super bold pattern. So I love like that's brilliant pattern to the party but not like super aggressive with it.
Melanie:
27:55
Right, for sure. And I, and I think that that takes it to the next level, right? I could just, I could have just worn the white button down, but it would have been a little bit less memorable
Heather:
28:03
Okay. I love that. Okay. I, I want to give you another scenario and that's something that's probably really relevant. We're heading into a conference season, which means a lot of organizations throw their annual conferences between the months of September and November. And so most people are probably going to some personal development or business development conference here in the next few months, which means they're going to be networking and schmoozing with other people. So do you have any tips for how to be a little bit more intentional with your style when you're going to like a networking event or a conference?
Melanie:
28:40
Yes. I love this because its a very specific situation, but we find herself in it now more often than not. So I would say that I, I've recently styled a friend, she was speaking at a conference, but she had other events too. And we actually gave her a color Palette for the whole event. She'd wear white and black and then she wore like a pop of color. And that way anytime someone saw her, it's like they recognized her from her speaking Gig or maybe from a party because she was wearing something that was memorable repeatedly. I don't think that they would say, oh, she only wears black and white, but something about her, the fact that she was wearing this sort of simplified, memorable color palette made it so people were like, oh, she looks familiar. It also simplifies it and gives you parameters for when you're for when you're packing. And I would also like to say that like that this is also a great time to just be on brand and to think about your website and think about your colors and say, okay, I'm showing up as my brand, right? So if I'm going to be networking and I'm giving my card, I'm doing all these things, how can I show up in a way that represents my brand? You know? And what that means.
Heather:
29:48
Oh my gosh, I love, love this tip so much because I, I feel kind of dumb that I have never considered this before. But as I did, like if you showing up as your brand, which is of course what this whole thing is about, but even going down to like putting those parameters around how you pack and only putting things in your suitcase for that event that sit within that, like that's huge.
Melanie:
30:10
It also will make it really easy because everything will probably go with everything else.
Heather:
30:14
Yes. Oh my gosh, that's a really good tip about the mixing and matching and I know we all pack and then sometimes we get to the location and we want to say like change things up. Yes. Okay. I love, I love that tip. Okay. One of the other things that I wanted to ask you about is, uh, okay. So let's give a.. Let me give some context first. If you want to have a like a big smile put on your face and instantly have a lot of energy, you need to go look at Melanie's website and just flip through her pictures and follow her on Instagram because she's one of my favorite people to follow because she's happy and what she's talking about with this bold lip and always just looking on brand, like one of the very first things I noticed with her was just like this, you exude happiness and it's very infectious. Like I love that. So,
Melanie:
30:58
so nice. Thank you.
Heather:
30:59
Yeah, of course. And so I think one of the things that I've always been in awe of you with is the, the fact that you show up every single day on Instagram stories for your audience. So knowing that that's probably something that for those listening are probably wanting to do something similar, I mildly related to the style, but more so just related to you and your personality. Would you talk just a little bit about any tips you have for showing up on stories every day and maybe how that fits into your brand?
Melanie:
31:28
Yeah. So I think that stories like a great way for people to get to know you in a very much more like authentic way than say like a static feed post. Like that's more, I love that too. But I think there's something really freeing about Instagram stories. And the more you do it, the more comfortable you are. Like now sometimes I'm like, I have dance parties a lot when I'm getting ready and I'll just like hit record if I'm listening to a song and I'm getting ready and like that's become a thing I do with people and it's a way to connect. Right? And for me, I used to not show up as much cause I'm like, I'm a stylist, I can't ever show up if I'm not like perfectly put together. And then I was like, but that's not really what I'm even trying to portray. Right. And I'm a human and sometimes I'm going to be just waking up, you know? So my number one thing is if you're not going to show up because you feel like you don't look perfect, do it anyway. Like don't not show up because you don't feel like you look completely put together because that's not what you have to say is like filled with amazing content and people are going to get to know you. No one's like, oh well she just went to the gym so she should not be coming on Instagram stories. If anything it you more relatable.
Heather:
32:41
I re I relate and agree with this so much and this, this has been a very big struggle for me to get comfortable with. I still get totally insecure when I go to post an Instagram story and I'm not wearing eyeliner. Like my solution is I put on the filter with the Instagram eyelashes and I just feel better. So I do it. But I love what you're saying. If the thought of you not being put together as the reason why you're not getting on stories like that's a cop out.
Melanie:
33:09
Right. And also like the only way that you're going to get really comfortable is to do it all the time. The other thing that I've been, I've do when I'm feeling like, okay, what am I gonna say is I'll give parameters. So like Monday I do a motivational, you know, something motivational. Tuesday I do a style tip Wednesday and they kind of say, okay, Wednesday I'm going to share some favorite Instagram accounts, whatever. If you in the beginning to get used to it, if you give yourself parameters, then you have something to talk about every day and you don't even have to tell people like, hey, it's Monday, Monday motivation. You can just do it and then that gives you like, okay, I know what I'm going to say.
Heather:
33:43
Yeah, okay. I love that so much that I'm stealing it. I'm totally stealing that. Cause that it's one of those things, it's trying to figure out what to say that and the, oh my gosh, I haven't taken a shower today or I don't feel my best together. Prevent us from taking action. And if you're trying to build a personal brand, showing up is like step number one.
Melanie:
34:02
Totally. And I think also it makes you more intentional about, so like if let's say you're like, okay, I'm going to plan out my week of Instagram store. What am I going to talk about each day? And sometimes I change it in the moment I'm like, okay, I know on Wednesday I want to talk about my blog post or I talk about my Instagram posts. So how can I relate my story to be around that and just like think about it. So then on that day I can just show up. I know what I'm going to say.
Heather:
34:26
Yeah. Okay. That is so great. This is extra bonus tip on this whole like showing up with more confidence, moving kind of away from the core of this. I want to get to know you and my audience gets to know you a little bit more too. And you talked about you being a mom and showing up for your kids and that was a big reason of why you went through this initial transformation. But talk to me a little bit about like balancing business life with being a mom. How has that been?
Melanie:
34:50
You know? It has been a journey. So I found out I was pregnant a week after I started my business. Oh my God. It's always been, well, you know, I've always been nap time, weekend, nighttime. That was always when they were little. That was sort of how it was. And as my business grew and as my kids grew, I started to realize that that wasn't sustainable and I had to be more like okay, really efficient with my time and also very intentional with my time. So like the biggest thing that I've learned is, I mean they're four and six, they're not like, you know, they just started going to school five days a week, both of them yesterday, but, but it's been a gradual thing or more childcare. Okay. What am I doing in that time? So for me it's like the thing that's been the biggest is being like these are going to be my hours, this is what I'm going to be working, what do I need to do? I'm like a crazy list person. It's like a list brain dump. And I do one every Sunday for the whole week. I do one every night for the next day so that I know what's happening and I've put everything on this list. Like sometimes I'll, I'll be like workout, shower, this, that because it all takes time. And then I'm like, okay, well how many, how many hours do we actually have to work if I'm going to make all these other things I priority too, you know? Yeah.
Heather:
36:10
That's so, so good. And I think I want to hit on this idea that you have been through, I mean the last six years since you've been a mom, like you've been through this crazy schedule, a balancing of business and that you still make time for taking care of yourself and styling yourself. So thinking about those listening who are going through a super busy season, maybe they still have a full time job and they're starting their side business or maybe they have little babies at home and it just, the idea of adding an additional thing to their plate right now of taking 20 minutes for themselves in the morning just seems daunting. Like do you have any tips or words of encouragement for them?
Melanie:
36:50
100% well, first of all, like all of these seasons are, are temporary and we like certain, sometimes things feel really hard and then all of a sudden that's not the hard thing anymore. I think that's always really important to mention cause I've been through plenty of those seasons. But I think that when it comes to like being a mom and being busy, it's so much of it is about like, I think being really present in those times that you are together and it's so quality over quantity I think. But then also if you have, if you're, if you're like, oh my God, I cannot even find 20 minutes. I honestly think it's one of those things where it time, time, what it is that really makes you feel your best. Look, let's say curling your hair makes you feel your best. Nothing else. If you time it and you're really good at it, let's say it takes you 10 minutes knowing that it takes you 10 minutes to do this, uh, makes it seem a little bit more manageable than if you're just like, I do not have the time to do that. So that's also, I mean I have a lot of tips like this. Like okay, quick and easy. What do you need to do? Like can your blush also be your lipstick? Like what can you do? You know, can you, can you, I also talk a lot about goto outfits. So like if you're a busy mom and you know your favorite three outfits that make you feel your best when you oversleep or when you're not feeling your best, you can go to it quickly and this will save you so much time and you still can feel confident. So it's not always about thinking about it. Like, I don't have the time for this. It's thinking about how it can save you time in the future.
Heather:
38:20
That is such a good point. And you know, that lesson serves with so many different things, not just planning out your morning and getting ready. You know, so often we, we are all overwhelmed with our to do lists. And what's kind of ironic is most of the things on our to do lists are looming on our minds that oh we have to do these things where we don't have time to do these things. The reality is we haven't actually taken any time to identify what the thing actually is. So like what you said, a length of the curling your hair, they, oh my gosh, I don't have time to curl your hair. Like if you really think about it, if it only takes you 10 minutes, do you really not have 10 minutes or you're just unwilling to accept that it only takes you 10 minutes. You just are.
Melanie:
39:03
Or are you thinking, well I have to call my hair and do this and do that. And maybe you don't. Maybe you've just decided that you're just going to clean your hair. Cause that's the thing that makes you feel good and it doesn't matter that you're not doing the other things. Yeah.
Heather:
39:13
Yeah. Letting go of all the rest and being, being good, choosing the thing that you're going to focus on. Right. Okay. So I think, I think that's super important, especially for for entrepreneurs who are working primarily from home is picking the things that are going to have the biggest impact to how you feel when you show up to your audience. Because that's really what's going to make you feel more magnetic.
Melanie:
39:35
100% that's great. Okay. So I would laugh to give you opportunity to share with my audience a little bit about your program, the confident closet because I know it's a killer one. So will you talk a little bit about that?
Melanie:
39:47
Yeah. So to me like so often every season we like go through and we're like, okay, we're going to clean out our closet. But like we don't actually make a dent. And this is because we're holding onto clothes for lots of different reasons. Sentimental attachment. Maybe we'll fit back into it another time. Maybe it used to be our favorite thing. There's a loads of reasons I were holding onto these clothes. So I sort of developed this, this six week long program that helps you make a real change. So we go through, we talk about our beauty basics, then we talk about, you know, really honing in on your personal style. And so when you go to clean out your closet, you know your style well. So you can say, nope, doesn't work for me. Nope, it doesn't work for me. This I can wear. So it gives you like a real framework for how to clean out your closet. And then we also talk about organization and shopping and how to love shopping if you don't and how to maintain. And we also do weekly Q and A's. So I help you through the process of it. Um, and yeah, there's an amazing community of women that do it at the same time as you. So you have accountability. It's, I, I'm like so proud of it. It really is like it's this program that there's videos and workbooks and it's just like it really helps make this process fun and easy and it makes a real change. So then every time, every season you're able to be like, I know what I like and it's in my closet, you know?
Heather:
41:12
Oh my gosh, it's so good. And I totally bypassed jumping in on this. When you opened your course last month and I'm kicking myself for it, I was sharing with Melanie before we hit record that I keep staring at my closet and looking at all of the business casual clothes that I am not wearing and I know I will not wear because I don't love them. I just needed to have more of them. I need to go through this and I think if for those of you listening, if you have this desire to create more of that it factor in your brand so that you can show up with confidence and become more magnetic to attract your ideal client. I, this really could be a big part of that for you is getting clarity on your style so you feel better showing up, whether it's on stage or on a zoom call or a prospect call or or on a Facebook live, whatever that looks like. So Melanie, where could they find more information about your program but also just about you and hang out?
Melanie:
42:07
Yeah. Well, so my website is the confidentcloset.com. I'll give you the, the leg for my course. There's two, there's the one where you can learn more, which is styles out the confidentcloset.com/learn more. Um, and then there's also a place to sign up for the waitlist. Perfect. I'll put both of those in the show notes. So if you guys scroll down, you can get links to both of those for you. Yeah. And then you guys can all join us for the next round of the competent classic course. Great. And.
Heather:
42:34
Okay. What's your Instagram handle? Cause that's where I love hanging out with you.
Melanie:
42:37
Yeah, at Melanie Kluger. K. L. U. G. E. R. K. L. U. G. E. R.
Heather:
42:42
Perfect. I'll put a link in the show notes below too. Okay. Melanie, before we wrap up here, do you have any other final parting thoughts for our listeners today?
Melanie:
42:50
Um, I just want to say that, well first of all, thank you for having me. This has been lovely.
Heather:
42:55
Of course, of course.
Melanie:
42:57
But you know, also really try to think about this, the process of style and getting dressed as something that can really like help you in your business and also help you feel more positive and confident every day and less about it being superficial. It really can be the, again, a joyful thing. And that's what I tried to preach.
Heather:
43:18
This is great. It's such good advice for someone that I again follow and admire online. And I think you have done an exceptional job owning your it factor and bring it every day too. I mean every aspect of your business. So if anything, at least go check Melanie out and get a sense of what it looks like to be magnetic. And if you can borrow some of the things she does, I think it'll help you out too. So thank you. I get so much for being here. Thank you guys all so much for listening. I hope you have an incredible day and we'll see you next.
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